I'm sorry, this is goodbye
by LouCullen
Summary: Bella, has some bad news, but doesn't get to tell the group what is up. She has too tell them four years letter, when time is running low. All Human


"Miss Isabella Swan would like to say some words and play us out. Miss Swan" The principal said, preparing the crowd for me. I didn't want to do this, not this way, but it was the only way and we were out of time. They wouldn't listen to me even if I tried to speak to them individually, not even my out brother. I had to give them an explanation for the day Edward say me in Jacob's arms 4 years ago. Since then, they just ignored me. I sighed and took my place in front of the microphone. My hatred for attention seemed to have evaporated when I took my place. I saw my parents, Carlisle, Esme and Jacob sitting there, smiling sadly up at me. They knew what time was coming; they were the only ones who knew.

I looked where my brother Emmett, his girlfriend Rosalie, her twin Jasper, his girlfriend Alice and her twin and my love Edward were sitting. They were all glaring at me, with the exception of Edward who was looking anywhere but at me.

"I just wanted to say I'm sorry" I started slowly "I'm sorry to Emmett, Rose, Ali, Jas and Edward" Edward looked up at me upon hearing his name, but I coward away from his eyes. "But I shouldn't have to be saying sorry. None of you were there when I needed you in my final years. I needed you, but you just ignored me, you didn't listen, you never gave me a chance to explain" I could feel the tears rolling down my face.

"Edward" I looked at him when I said his name, and he was looking at me, with a solemn face and I let what I said sink in. "I never cheated on you. I love you too much to ever be able to do that too you. What you saw that day was Jacob comforting me. He was visiting Billy and I fell into him as I left Carlisle's office. I had just found out I had cancer and I had pretty much been given a timer for when my life would run out. Don't get mad at Carlisle, I told him not to tell you, I was going to do that myself" I took a deep breath and wiped the tears off my face. "Don't feel guilty. I love you all, and you made the years I was friends with you the best time. So thank you" I picked up my guitar and started playing.

Turn away

If you could get me a drink of water

'Cause my lips are chapped and faded  
Call my Aunt Marie

Help her gather all my things

And bury me in all my favourite colours

My sisters and my brothers, still  
I will not kiss you

'Cause the hardest part of this

Is leaving you  
Now turn away

'Cause I'm awful just to see

'Cause all my hair's abandoned all my body  
Oh, my agony

Know that I will never marry

Baby, I'm just soggy from the chemo

But counting down the days to go  
It just ain't living

And I just hope you know

That if you say

(If you say)

Goodbye today

(Goodbye today)

I'd ask you to be true

('Cause I'd ask you to be true)  
'Cause the hardest part of this

Is leaving you

'Cause the hardest part of this

Is leaving you

When I finished strumming, I wiped the tears off my face and looked at the people I used to know as my family.

"I love you all, I can't thank you enough for what you have done for me in the past 18years" I looked at my brother, who looked dead "Emmie, I love you, you were the best big brother a girl could ever need. I'm sorry I hadn't told you about this" with that I put my guitar down and walked out of the building into the cool evening as, the tears streamed down my face.

A few minutes later I heard the fast moving of many footfalls, and turned just in time to see Alice, Rosalie and Jasper embracing me in a hug, each mumbling and apology to me. Edward was stood a few feet watching us. When my eyes met his, they were red rimmed and puffy. After returning their hug I walked out of their embrace and over to Edward.

"B...bella" He stuttered "It can't be true, you're only 18"

"I'm sorry, Edward I have a couple months max left" I felt the tears stream harder down my face.

"I'm so sorry, Bella. I should have listened I should have given you a chance to explain"

"Don't feel guilty Edward, I should have made you listen. Or at least let your father tell you, when I couldn't. But I wanted to be the one to tell you." He closed the small gap between us and wrapped his arms around me, it was the happiest I had been in four years. He was the one person who could genuinely make me happy.

"Bella, I love you. So much" he pressed his lips to my forehead.

"I love you too, Edward. I'm sorry I waited till it was too late to tell you"

We stayed in silence for a few minutes, just holding each other. When I pulled away, behind me, Jasper was holding a sobbing Alice and Rosalie, with his own tears rolling down his face. The only person not around was, Emmett.

"Bells?" someone whispered. When I looked over Edward's shoulder, Emmett was stood there, with tears running down his face.

"Em"I whispered back as I walked up to him. When I was in front of him, he collapsed to his knees, sobbing. I knelt in front of him, sobbing myself. "Em, I'm so sorry for not telling you, I'm sorry for telling mum and dad not to tell you. I wanted to be the one to tell you but I could never find the time to force it out."

"How could I not notice, my baby sister dying? Right in front of my eyes. How did I not notice your constant hospital visits, your constant time off school, the fact that you are pretty much wasting away in front of my eyes right now?" he was angry at himself, and that hurt.

"Em, I did everything I could to make sure you wouldn't notice" we sat there crying together crying for a good hour, before I became too weak to stay awake.

Over the next week, I made sure I had everything sorted, before I passed. The letters I wrote for every one were on my dresser ready for my last and final trip into hospital.

**EdPOV**

Two weeks, that's all I got with her, a measly two weeks. I had to be so stupid and jump straight to the conclusion.

I felt the tears from down my cheek; my father had just pronounced Bella dead, before handing, everyone in the room and envelope, with their name written in Bella's scrawl.

_Dear Edward,_

_If you are reading this, it means I've gone and I'm not coming back,_

_Don't be sad, you know I always hated when you had a frown on your face, it was my time, that's all._

_I love you, so much Edward. I know when we first said those words to each other; people thought we were crazy and too young to know what love was. But I know, what I felt for you, was in fact love._

_Even though for the past four years, you've hated me, I've never stopped loving you. I always have loved you and I always will._

_Don't do anything drastic, please. You're family need you and I need you to look after Little Ali for me, and to keep an eye on Em._

_I miss you and I'm sorry for not giving you more notice, to what was happening, but you wouldn't listen._

_I love you, forever and always._

_Love Isabella._

The tears streamed faster down my face and I knew it was over. My life was over. How am I supposed to go on without her? I was a shell of who I used to be after we broke up, but I still had the joy of seeing her. Now she's no longer here.

**EmPOV**

I can't believe it, my little Belly is gone. The one girl I loved unconditionally. I used to be so close to her, but because of a stupid rivalry between Jacob and me, I took the wrong side that unfortunate day four years ago.

I left the lump in my throat as Carlisle handed me the letter from Bella.

_Dear Emmett,_

_If you are reading this, it means I've gone and I'm not coming back,_

_Don't be sad though, brother bear, it was just my time._

_I love you so much, Em, you're the best brother a girl could ever deserve. I know why you took Edward's side, and I understand too. I'm so proud of you for sticking to your beliefs. Even if it was against me, I've never known you to last so long and you told me about Jacob. I'm sorry he was the first I went too, he was the first familiar face I saw other than Carlisle and I needed the comfort._

_I'm sorry I mad mum and dad, promise not to tell you. I love you._

_Look after them for me, and Rose, Alice and Jasper. And please stay strong on your support for Edward. _

_I love you so much Em Bear._

_Forever and Always, Big brother._

_Love Bella._

For Bella I'm going to do anything in my power to keep my family and friends safe. I owe her that much at least. I love you Isabella Marie Swan. Watch over us.

**There you go I'm sorry for it being rather depressing, I've just had lots of negative feeling in me recently and I thought what better way than to let them out in my writing.**

**I got the original idea of a fanfiction a read a long time ago, but I can no longer find it. If you do find it let me know. And also let me know what you think.**


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